Cyber Attribution Report

Cyber Attack Attribution Report


Country: Fiji
APT Group Name: COCONUTS HAVE EYES
Attack Vector: TOR Exit Node
Malware Used: Downloader.Gofarer
Data lost in the breach: Screenplay for next James Bond movie
Who's to blame? Dick Cheney
Who's getting fired? Board of directors
Contributing factors/excuses: Budget Reduction
Will Fox News call it "Cyber Terrorism?" No
Will we be targeted again? Too late to ask...
Cost of the data loss: $10,000,000
How much did you save using this tool for attribution? Ten thousand shares of Enron stock